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Captain Picard, Ensign Ro, Guinan, and Keiko O'Brien are turned into children by a transporter accident, but retain their adult memories, resulting in different reactions from each. When rogue Ferengi hijack the Enterprise, the young crewmembers, along with Alexander, lead the revolt.

Summary

"Captain's Log, Stardate 46235.7. Ensign Ro, Keiko O'Brien, Guinan and I are returning to the Enterprise after a fascinating visit to the planet Marlonia."

Coming back from a botanic expedition on the planet Marlonia where Keiko O'Brien found a specimen of Draebidium calimus, the shuttlecraft Fermi containing Ro Laren, Captain Jean-Luc Picard, Keiko, and Guinan falls victim of an energy anomaly. The emergency transport back is difficult, and the crew of the USS Enterprise-D is shocked by the return of a twelve-year-old captain, bartender, botanist, and Bajoran ensign instead of their adult selves.

Despite their new appearances, the crew is determined to continue their duties. However, they all find it hard to do so. Picard gives the command to head to Ligos VII once they are done salvaging the remains of shuttlecraft he was in, but the bridge crew is slightly intimidated to be under the command of a twelve-year-old captain. Picard attempts to make the change work, despite Dr. Crusher's suggestions, but soon realizes the wiser course of action. He hands over temporary command to Commander Riker, and retires to his quarters.

Elsewhere on the ship, Guinan and Ro are trying to adjust to their new lifestyles. Ro just wants to return to duty, while Guinan is enjoying this experience. Ro complains constantly about how she hates being a child, and Guinan insists how fun childhood is. She finally persuades Ro to have a little childhood fun, which apparently allows Ro to relax and enjoy her times: They jump on a bed, each trying to jump higher than the other.

Also, Keiko is having some trouble of her own. Being a child now, it is hard for her husband, Miles, to accept the fact that she resembles the image of a twelve-year-old girl. He says that he will adjust, but Keiko's daughter, Molly, does not respond the same. She does not recognize her mother when she comes to read her a bedtime story. Miles, not having the heart to break the news to Molly, offers to read the night's story.

"First Officer's Log, supplemental. The Enterprise has reached the Ligos system, and we have begun to search for the missing Federation science team. Doctor Crusher reports no progress on a cure for the members of the shuttle crew."

Meanwhile, Dr. Crusher thinks she has found a solution to the problem. After using a rapid growth mechanism, she discovers that the missing genetic codes that dictate the officer's appearance can be replaced in the transporter beam. Before she can attempt her plan, though, the ship is taken hostage by renegade Ferengi who have already taken command of two Klingon warships. Riker manages to lock out the computer's command functions. All adults, with the exception of Commander Riker, who is needed to remove the encryption of the computer, are transported to the surface for manual labor.

However, the senior officers who were transformed into children are still allowed to remain on board with all the other children. First, Picard and Keiko lure the Ferengi in the transporter room out with a toy car, obtain phasers, and set up a force field around the transporter pad. Then Alexander steals two hyposprays from sickbay. By tricking the Ferengi guard outside the room in which he is held captive by acting petulant (as a child might), Picard manages to contact Riker, under the pretense that Riker is his father. Pretending to want to play computer games, Picard conveys the message to Riker to activate the LCARS net in the schoolroom which would give them full access to the computer systems. Once Picard is back in the classroom, the lead Ferengi, DaiMon Lurin, threatens to harm the children if Riker does not unlock the computer and teach his lieutenant how to operate the Enterprise. Riker pretends to instruct the Ferengi officer but only speaks in technobabble. On the side, Riker unlocks the computer in the classroom.

When the "children" gain control to the transporter, they start using comm badges to beam the Ferengi behind the force field on the transporter pad. First, the badge on the toy car beams the Ferengi in the transporter room behind the force field. Then, Ro and Guinan beam the Ferengi in engineering out. Alexander gives the guard outside the door a badge which beams him out. Keiko knocks out the Ferengi patrolling the hallway. With help from Riker, Picard disables the Ferengi on the bridge. Picard then goes and gets the Ferengi in the ready room "out of his chair."

"Captain's Log, Stardate 46236.3. We have taken Lurin and his men into custody. The Ferengi Alliance has quickly disavowed any knowledge of these renegades. With the mining operation closed and our crew back on board, we can now turn our attention to other problems."

After the Ferengi are taken into custody, the doctor uses the transporter to change Picard, Keiko, and Guinan back into adults. However, at Guinan's suggestion, Ro stays a child a little longer so she can finally learn to enjoy her childhood.

Memorable Quotes

"Look at these fragments. They're... they're very nearly in perfect condition, and yet they're seven hundred years old."
"So is my father."

- Picard and Guinan


"Well, I should be doing something, instead of just standing around, waiting for them to find a cure!"
"You're right. Let's go play."

- Young Ro and young Guinan


"I haven't been young for a long time and I intend to enjoy every minute of it."

- Young Guinan


"It's... I don't know, but this feels wrong somehow."
"Miles Edward O'Brien, I am still your wife."
"- Technically, yes. "
"- Technically?"
"No, I-I mean, of course you're my wife. But you're also ten years old."
"Beverly said it's actually closer to 12."
"- That's not the point. -"
"So what is the point? - Is our marriage over?"
"- I didn't say that. But until they find a way to reverse this effect, it's hard to ignore the fact that you're a little girl."

- Miles O' Brien and Young Keiko


"You could return to the Academy. Take another degree. Brush up on your Latin."
"And be Wesley Crusher's roommate?"

- Troi and Young Picard, discussing Picard's choices while waiting for his body to mature again


"[...] I've spent my life looking forward [...]"

- Young Picard, about his attitude toward life


"It's a child's computer, Remember? Computer, can you show me a picture of the inside of the Enterprise?"
"Yes, I can. The Enterprise is a Galaxy-class starship. Can you spell Enterprise? E-N-T-E-R-..."
"Delete audio!"

- Young Guinan, elementary school computer, and young Picard


"This is the first time these Jefferies tubes haven't seemed cramped."
"How much farther do we have to go?"
"About fifty meters. Don't tell me you're tired."
"I'm not as young as I used to be." Shared chuckle

- Young Ro and young Guinan


"I need to see my father. ... I need to see him right now! ... I need to see him now! Now, now, now, now, now, now, now, N- Stop it; you hurt me! I want my father! I want my father!"

- Young Picard to the Ferengi guard outside the classroom


"Thanks, number one."
(A Ferengi guard eyes Picard and Riker with suspicion)
"- He's my number one Dad!"
(Picard and Riker embrace, grinning widely)

- Young Picard, plotting with Riker to recapture the Enterprise


"Okay, Morta. The Enterprise computer system is controlled by three primary main processor cores, cross-linked with redundant melacortz-ramistat 14-kiloquad interface modules. The core element is based on an FTL nanoprocessor with 25 bilateral kelilactirals. With twenty of those being slaved into the primary Heisenfram terminals. Now, you know what a bilateral kelilactiral is?"
"Of course I do, Human. I am not stupid!"
"No. Of course not. This is the isopalavial interface which controls the main firomantal drive unit. Don't touch that - you'll blow up the entire firomantal drive."
"Alright, wa..wa..Wait! Wha..what is a, a ferromactal drive? Just explain it to me!"
"That is the firomantal drive unit, it controls the ramistat core and keeps the ontarian manifold at 40,000 KRGs. The firomantal drive is powered by..."

- Riker, spouting gibberish (and just a hint of real treknobabble) about the inner workings of the Enterprise computer to Morta (Riker repeatedly says 'firomantal', Morta mispronounces it)


"I believe you're in my chair."

- Young Picard, as he points a phaser at the Ferengi in the ready room


"Did you do this one, too?"
"Uh-huh. I did that one, all of them!"

- Adult Guinan and young Ro discussing Ro's drawings

Background information

Whoopi Goldberg and Cosmo Genovese

Goldberg and script supervisor Cosmo Genovese on set

Story and production

  • Ronald D. Moore commented: "When Michael bought the premise I thought he was completely insane: An Away Team rematerializes on the transporter as children — with adult minds! I tried again and again to bury this idea, which of course meant that I would get saddled with the inevitable rewrite when the script came in. I just thought it was a ludicrous idea and wanted nothing to do with it. That said, once I got the assignment, the professional writer in me had to commit to the material and do the best with it that I could, so I tried very hard to bring humor and humanity to the proceedings, chiefly through the Guinan/Ro story that I did end up liking in the end. I still cringe when I think of the episode (the Ferengi capture the Enterprise in a couple of broken down Birds of Prey???) but many people have told me how much they like it." (AOL chat, 1997)
  • This episode is directed by Adam Nimoy, the son of Leonard Nimoy. He also later directed "Timescape".
  • First UK airdate: 23 August 1995

Cast

Adam Nimoy and David Tristan Birkin

Adam Nimoy directs Birkin

Continuity

  • There is a reference to this episode in the Deep Space Nine fourth season episode "Bar Association". In that episode, Odo cites the case of the Ferengi invaders as an example of a security breach aboard the Enterprise-D.
  • Two shots of the battle against the Birds-of-Prey were reused from "Yesterday's Enterprise".
  • Captain Kirk and crew had undergone a similar change (reverting to children) in the Star Trek: The Animated Series episode "The Counter-Clock Incident".
  • Picard pretending to be Riker's son recalls the episode "Future Imperfect", in which Riker had a son named Jean-Luc in a holographic simulation of the Enterprise-D.
  • Picard pretended to be Riker's son to signal Riker to transfer command functions to the Children's computer to "School Room 8", but when the camera pans to a screenshot of the computer, it clearly reads "Classroom 7" at the top of the screen.

Video and DVD releases

Links and references

Starring

Also starring

Guest stars

And

Special guest star

Co-stars

Uncredited co-stars

Stunt doubles

Stand-ins

References

anesthizine; archeology; bioscan; B'rel-class; Buranian; calcium; class 4 probe; Crusher, Wesley; DaiMon; Draebidium calimus; Draebidium froctus; Earl Grey tea; elements; Federation; Ferengi Salvage Code; Fermi; firomactal drive; Galaxy-class; Humuhumunukunukuapua'a; Jefferies tube; jumper; keiyurium; kelilactiral; kiloquad; Langford, Dr.; Ligos VII; Ligos system; Lurin's Bird-of-Prey; Marlonia; mercury (element); microfracture; molecular reversion field; phase inducer; plant biology; quad; red alert; ribo-viroxic-nucleic structure; Ro Talia; Romulans; sabbatical; security access code; Square root; Starfleet Academy; Sulvin IV; Taguan; Tarcassian razor beast; tin; tritanium; turbolift; type 6 shuttlecraft; Vendarite

Library Computer References

Table of Elements: Accurentum; Averyonium; Babaloo; Beium; Bermanium; Brownfieldium; Bugsonian; Californium; Cavorite; Chanockian; Cheeseium; Chico; Chronister; Cosmoium; Craftium; Curly; Daffyduckium; Dentium; Dilithium; Disneyium; Drapanas; Duckdodgers; Estonianium; Exitstageleft; Fieldium; Franconium; Freedonia; Gamma series; Groucho; Grouchoian; Harpo; Hawkeye; Hobbes; Hydrogen; Hypersonic series; Jamesium; Johnsonium; Jonesium; Keiyurium; Kryptonite; Lithium; Magnumium PI; Mazdaium; Meeseian; Mega series; Monty; Neskoromnium; Omega series; Paramount; Pillerium; Poi; Potatoeium; Princessium; Purseronite; Quarkian; Redskinium; Rhubarbium; Smutkoian; Snarkium; Sodium; Stimsonium; Stoogeian; Stoogeium; Sufferin'sucat; Thomsonian; Tngonian; Transonic series; World series; Yacobian; Zeppo

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Star Trek: The Next Generation
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